I’m a soldier that’s lost the need for a medic.
True, I once came crawling into your tent with a collection of wounds
And you managed to sew and salvage the battered portions of my damaged flesh
Breathed love and affection into my scars and bullet holes until my form returned to health
But as much as I value your ability to nurse weakness into strength with momentum
Id be too tempted to never venture away from where it’s safe if I stay within arms reach avoiding the harm I escaped from
See I can’t grow in rehab. I’m not a potted plant that could retire as easily as trees in a greenhouse.
Im in need of a forest,
unafraid of brush fire and not even an axe could hold me back from the freedom i once ran from
Lions only die in cages separate from their pride and I’d much prefer to end up a pelt over the shoulder of a predator than to embrace death without a fight involved.
My honor is worth more to me than the concept of comfort.
I’d do my bloodline disservice to settle for convenience over capturing the dangerous and complicated.
So I’m sorry but I can’t call on you the next time the front lines bring me to the edge of flatlines
I can’t rely on you to extract shrapnel from grenades I laid on.
I won’t ask you to act like I don’t go looking for land mines just to make sure that the next man to march behind me doesn’t lose life or limb.
I’m still waiting on September to end and d-day to bring me an armistice but I can’t promise that when my ship comes into port
And I’m taking in the fanfare afforded young boys sent off to become men in this seemingly endless war
That you’ll be the woman in uniform I’ve been sleeping in trenches behind enemy lines just to see at my tours end.
You just aren’t the girl I’m looking for.
From the desk of S.G.
To that guy who said goodbye to me with a knife behind his back in his front yard
It’s been ten years.
And yet the blood of my greatest kill is still my second skin
Red colors my hand, stained and sticky as the day I put palm to the object of my affection and plucked a diamond in the rough away from a boy who couldn’t smooth out the rough edges
I wonder if he’ll ever understand my regret. That while I wanted the woman of my dreams I never thought I’d be the author of this guys nightmares
While I prayed to God that I wouldn’t condemn a union to hell before the revelation arrived, I do not apologize for becoming the hand of the most high
Putting a benediction where this kids appeal fell on deaf ears.
I never planned to produce a kind of hatred that would keep things heated between he and me even while miles made sure any Mizpah was maintained
I know that none of us are blameless but still is it juvenile to think that nearing the prime of life that maybe he’d consider forgiveness?
I never expected to make bankrupt one man’s patience just to see my own happiness enriched, couldn’t put a price on my prize but still didn’t think he’d put all his chips behind a bluff.
I am sorry but no matter how many years extend our minds between now and what I’ve tried to place behind me
It seems like it’ll never be enough.
See you at Alumni
Hopefully our kids will get to be the friends fate never intended for us to become.
Wouldn’t it be funny if my daughters fell in love with your sons?
if you give me an email i’ll send you the questions
I have a questionaire about Native/First Nation/Indigenous Culture for my Intercultural Class and I need varying opinions.
Please let me know if you’re able to or interested. (Anonymity is an option if preferred.)